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Category: Funny Animal Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems about animals, snakes, lions, cats, birds, frogs, and more.


I am a lone, unfathered chick,
    Of artificial hatching,
A pilgrim in a desert wild,
By happier, mothered chicks reviled,
From all relationships exiled,
    To do my own lone scratching.

Fair science smiled upon my birth
    One raw and gusty morning;
But ah, the sounds of barnyard mirth
To lonely me have little worth;
Alone am I in all the earth--
    An orphan without borning.

Seek I my mother? I would find
    A heartless personator;
A thing brass-feathered, man-designed,
With steam-pipe arteries intermined,
And pulseless cotton-batting lined--
    A patent incubator.

It wearies me to think, you see--
    Death would be better, rather--
Should downy chicks be hatched of me,
By fate's most pitiless decree,
My piping pullets still would be
    With never a grandfather.

And when to earth I bid adieu
    To seek a planet greater,
I will not do as others do,
Who fly to join the ancestral crew,
For I will just be gathered to
    My incubator.

                 Robert J. Burdette.

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