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Category: Funny Bathos Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems ranging from the sublime to the trivial and ridiculous.


"Wherefore starts my bosom's lord?
    Why this anguish in thine eye?
Oh, it seems as thy heart's chord
    Had broken with that sigh!

"Rest thee, my dear lord, I pray,
    Rest thee on my bosom now!
And let me wipe the dews away,
    Are gathering on thy brow.

"There, again! that fevered start!
    What, love! husband! is thy pain?
There is a sorrow in thy heart,
    A weight upon thy brain!

"Nay, nay, that sickly smile can ne'er
    Deceive affection's searching eye;
'Tis a wife's duty, love, to share
    Her husband's agony.

"Since the dawn began to peep,
    Have I lain with stifled breath;
Heard thee moaning in thy sleep,
    As thou wert at grips with death.

"Oh, what joy it was to see
    My gentle lord once more awake!
Tell me, what is amiss with thee?
    Speak, or my heart will break!"

"Mary, thou angel of my life,
    Thou ever good and kind;
'Tis not, believe me, my dear wife,
    The anguish of the mind!

"It is not in my bosom, dear,
    No, nor in my brain, in sooth;
But, Mary, oh, I feel it here,
    Here in my wisdom tooth!

"Then give,--oh, first, best antidote,--
    Sweet partner of my bed!
Give me thy flannel petticoat
    To wrap around my head!"

                 William E. Aytoun.

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