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Category: Funny Juniors Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems for children, about kids, and for kids of all shapes and sizes.


I haf von funny leedle poy,
    Vot comes schust to mine knee;
Der queerest schap, der createst rogue,
    As efer you dit see.
He runs, und schumps, und schmashes dings
    In all barts off der house:
But vot off dot? He vas mine son,
    Mine leedle Yawcob Strauss.

He get der measles und der mumbs
    And eferyding dot's oudt;
He sbills mine glass off lager bier,
    Poots schnuff indo mine kraut.
He fills mine pipe mit Limburg cheese--
    Dot vas der roughest chouse;
I'd dake dot vrom no oder poy
    But leedle Yawcob Strauss.

He dakes der milk-ban for a dhrum,
    Und cuts mine cane in dwo,
To make der schticks to beat it mit--
    Mine cracious, dot vas drue!
I dinks mine hed vas schplit abart,
    He kicks oup sooch a touse:
But nefer mind; der poys vas few
    Like dot young Yawcob Strauss.

He asks me questions sooch as dese:
    Who baints mine nose so red?
Who vas it cuts dot schmoodth blace oudt
    Vrom der hair ubon mine hed?
Und vere dere plaze goes vrom her lamp
    Vene'er der glim I douse.
How gan I all dose dings eggsblain
    To dot schmall Yawcob Strauss?

I somedimes dink I schall go vild
    Mit sooch a grazy poy,
Und vish vonce more I gould haf rest,
    Und beaceful dimes enshoy;
But ven he vas aschleep in ped
    So guiet as a mouse,
I prays der Lord, "Dake anyding,
    But leaf dot Yawcob Strauss."

                 Charles Follen Adams.

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