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Category: Funny Whimsical Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems using whimsy. Humourosly quaint and fanciful, especially in an amusing way.

  O D V  


"True 'tis P T, and P T 'tis, 'tis true."

In I V Lane, of C T fame,
    There lived a man D C,
And A B I 6 was his name,
    Now mark his history.

Long time his conduct free from blame
    Did merit L O G,
Until an evil spirit came
    In the shape of O D V.

"O! that a man into his mouth
    Should put an N M E
To steal away his brains"--no drouth
    Such course from sin may free.

Well, A B drank, the O T loon!
    And learned to swear, sans ruth;
And then he gamed, and U Z soon
    To D V 8 from truth.

An hourly glass with him was play,
    He'd swallow that with phlegm;
Judge what he'd M T in a day,
    "X P D Herculem."

Of virtue none to sots, I trow,
    With F E K C prate;
And O of N R G could now
    From A B M N 8.

Who on strong liquor badly dote,
    Soon poverty must know;
Thus A B in a C D coat
    Was shortly forced to go.

From poverty D C T he caught,
    And cheated not A F U,
For what he purchased paying O,
    Or but an "I O U."

Or else when he had tried B 4,
    To shirk a debt, his wits,
He'd cry, "You shan't wait N E more,
    I'll W or quits."

So lost did I 6 now A P R,
    That said his wife, said she,
"F U act so, your fate quite clear
    Is for 1 2 4 C."

His inside soon was out and out
    More fiery than K N;
And while his state was thereabout
    A cough C V R came.

He I P K Q N A tried,
    And linseed T and rue;
But O could save him, so he died
    As every 1 must 2.

Poor wight! till black in' the face he raved,
    'Twas P T S 2 C
His latest spirit "spirit" craved--
    His last words, "O D V."


I'll not S A to preach and prate,
    But tell U if U do
Drink O D V at such R 8,
    Death will 4 stall U 2.

O U then who A Y Z have,
    Shun O D V as a wraith,
For 'tis a bonus to the grave,
    An S A unto death.


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