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Category: Funny Whimsical Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems using whimsy. Humourosly quaint and fanciful, especially in an amusing way.

  RHYME OF THE RAIL  

Singing through the forests,
    Rattling over ridges,
Shooting under arches,
    Rumbling over bridges,
Whizzing through the mountains,
    Buzzing o'er the vale--
Bless me! this is pleasant,
    Riding on the Rail!

Men of different "stations"
    In the eye of Fame
Here are very quickly
    Coming to the same.
High and lowly people,
    Birds of every feather,
On a common level
    Travelling together.

Gentleman in shorts,
    Looming very tall;
Gentleman at large,
    Talking very small;
Gentleman in tights,
    With a loose-ish mien;
Gentleman in grey,
    Looking rather green;

Gentleman quite old,
    Asking for the news;
Gentleman in black,
    In a fit of blues;
Gentleman in claret,
    Sober as a vicar;
Gentleman in tweed,
    Dreadfully in liquor!

Stranger on the right,
    Looking very sunny,
Obviously reading
    Something very funny.
Now the smiles are thicker,
    Wonder what they mean?
Faith, he's got the |Knicker-
    Bocker| Magazine!

Stranger on the left,
    Closing up his peepers;
Now he snores again,
    Like the Seven Sleepers;
At his feet a volume
    Gives the explanation,
How the man grew stupid
    From "Association."

Ancient maiden lady
    Anxiously remarks,
That there must be peril
    'Mong so many sparks;
Roguish-looking fellow,
    Turning to the stranger,
Says it's his opinion
    She is out of danger!

Woman with her baby,
    Sitting vis-a-vis,
Baby keeps a-squalling,
    Woman looks at me;
Asks about the distance,
    Says it's tiresome talking,
Noises of the cars
    Are so very shocking!

Market-woman, careful
    Of the precious casket,
Knowing eggs are eggs,
    Tightly holds her basket;
Feeling that a smash,
    If it came, would surely
Send her eggs to pot
    Rather prematurely.

Singing through the forests,
    Rattling over ridges,
Shooting under arches,
    Rumbling over bridges,
Whizzing through the mountains,
    Buzzing o'er the vale;
Bless me! this is pleasant,
    Riding on the Rail!

                        John G. Saxe.


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