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Category: Funny Women Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems for women, and about women. The good, the bad, and the lovely.

  GIFTS RETURNED  

"You must give back," her mother said,
To a poor sobbing little maid,
"All the young man has given you,
Hard as it now may seem to do."
"'Tis done already, mother dear!"
Said the sweet girl, "So never fear."
        Mother. Are you quite certain? Come, recount
(There was not much) the whole amount.
     Girl. The locket; the kid gloves.
     Mother. Go on.
     Girl. Of the kid gloves I found but one.
     Mother. Never mind that. What else? Proceed.
You gave back all his trash?
     Girl. Indeed.
     Mother. And was there nothing you would save?
     Girl. Everything I could give I gave.
     Mother. To the last tittle?
     Girl. Even to that.
     Mother. Freely?
     Girl. My heart went pit-a-pat
At giving up ... ah me! ah me!
I cry so I can hardly see ...
All the fond looks and words that past,
And all the kisses, to the last.

                                Walter Savage Landor.


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