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Category: Funny Women Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems for women, and about women. The good, the bad, and the lovely.

  THE WIDOW MALONE  

Did you hear of the Widow Malone
                                            O hone!
Who lived in the town of Athlone
                                            Alone?
O, she melted the hearts
Of the swains in them parts;
So lovely the Widow Malone,
                                            O hone!
So lovely the Widow Malone.
Of lovers she had a full score
                                            Or more;
And fortunes they all had galore
                                            In store;
From the minister down
To the clerk of the Crown,
All were courting the Widow Malone
                                            O hone!
All were courting the Widow Malone.

But so modest was Mrs. Malone,
                                            'Twas known,
That no one could see her alone,
                                            O hone!
Let them ogle and sigh,
They could ne'er catch her eye;
So bashful the Widow Malone,
                                            O hone!
So bashful the Widow Malone.

Till one Mister O'Brien from Clare,
                                            How quare!
'Tis little for blushing they care
                                            Down there;
Put his arm round her waist,
Gave ten kisses at laste,
And says he, "You're my Molly Malone,
                                            My own."
Says he, "You're my Molly Malone."

And the widow they all thought so shy--
                                            My eye!
Never thought of a simper or sigh;
                                            For why?
"O Lucius," said she,
"Since you've now made so free,
You may marry your Mary Malone,
                                            Your own;
You may marry your Mary Malone."
There's a moral contained in my song,
                                            Not wrong;
And one comfort it's not very long,
                                            But strong:--
If for widows you die,
Learn to kiss--not to sigh,
For they're all like sweet Mistress Malone!
                                            O hone!
O they're all like sweet Mistress Malone!

                                                 Charles Lever.


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