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Category: Funny Banter Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems in a playful, teasing, and good-natured way.


    The Food Scientist tells us: "A deficiency of iron, phosphorus,
    potassium, calcium and the other mineral salts, colloids and
    vitamines of vegetable origin leads to numerous forms of physical

I yearn to bite on a Colloid
    With phosphorus, iron and Beans;
I want to be filled with Calcium, grilled,
    And Veg'table Vitamines!

I yearn to bite on a Colloid
    (Though I don't know what it means)
To line my inside with Potassium, fried,
    And Veg'table Vitamines.

I would sate my soul with spinach
    And dandelion greens.
No eggs, nor ham, nor hard-boiled clam,
    But Veg'table Vitamines.

Hi, Waiter! Coddle the Colloids
    With phosphorus, iron and Beans;
Though Mineral Salts may have some faults,
    Bring on the Vitamines.


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