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Category: Funny Satire Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems using irony, exaggeration and ridicule, to expose and criticize stupidity and vices.

  SKY-MAKING  

Just take a trifling handful, O philosopher,
Of magic matter, give it a slight toss over
    The ambient ether, and I don't see why
        You shouldn't make a sky.

O hours Utopian which we may anticipate!
Thick London fog how easy 'tis to dissipate,
    And make the most pea-soupy day as clear
        As Bass's brightest beer!

Poet-professor! now my brain thou kindlest;
I am become a most determined Tyndallist.
    If it is known a fellow can make skies,
        Why not make bright blue eyes?

This to deny, the folly of a dunce it is;
Surely a girl as easy as a sunset is.
    If you can make a halo or eclipse,
        Why not two laughing lips?

The creed of Archimedes, erst of Sicily,
And of D'Israeli ... forti nil difficile,
    Is likewise mine. Pygmalion was a fool
        Who should have gone to school.

Why should an author scribble rhymes or articles?
Bring me a dozen tiny Tyndall particles;
    Therefrom I'll coin a dinner, Nash's wine,
        And a nice girl to dine.

                                                 Mortimer Collins.


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