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Category: Funny Satire Poems
       Classic humorous and funny poems using irony, exaggeration and ridicule, to expose and criticize stupidity and vices.

  THE IDEAL HUSBAND TO HIS WIFE  

We've lived for forty years, dear wife,
    And walked together side by side,
And you to-day are just as dear
    As when you were my bride.
I've tried to make life glad for you,
    One long, sweet honeymoon of joy,
A dream of marital content,
    Without the least alloy.
I've smoothed all boulders from our path,
    That we in peace might toil along,
By always hastening to admit
    That I was right and you were wrong.

No mad diversity of creed
    Has ever sundered me from thee;
For I permit you evermore
    To borrow your ideas of me.
And thus it is, through weal or woe,
    Our love forevermore endures;
For I permit that you should take
    My views and creeds, and make them yours.
And thus I let you have my way,
    And thus in peace we toil along,
For I am willing to admit
    That I am right and you are wrong.

And when our matrimonial skiff
    Strikes snags in love's meandering stream,
I lift our shallop from the rocks,
    And float as in a placid dream.
And well I know our marriage bliss
    While life shall last will never cease;
For I shall always let thee do,
    In generous love, just what I please.
Peace comes, and discord flies away,
    Love's bright day follows hatred's night;
For I am ready to admit
    That you are wrong and I am right.

                                    Sam Walter Foss.


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